I'm not really sure what feelings to vent (as established already I'm not stressed), so I thought why don't I share the first basic and most dreaded step that everybody who chose their own life partner had to take: Telling the Parents!
Now I'm not saying that there is any easy way to do it, but let's give our parents a little more credit shall we? Parents these days are way cooler than they were ever in the history of our country. So with that situation in mind, breaking the news should be a piece of cake. Right? Not quite?
Anyway, to each his own. I'm not sure if there is a guide book on how to approach this topic, so I'll just share my experience (which was relatively easy) and maybe people could borrow a leaf from it. It would have been tricky for me given that the "Boy" and I belong to different communities, yes it kind of still is a big deal but then it somehow only adds to my amusement now.
Oh yeah.. sorry I have a habit of digressing, I was sharing how I told my parents, lets start: We started dating about three years ago, it was then itself that I told my mom that there's this Bong guy in office and he likes me ( talk about forward thinking!! At that point of time I wasn't even sure if there ever would be a future and I happily told my mom) her reaction was as expected muted and non approving. She told me, I don't think you should encourage him, he's not the same as us ( Moms I tell you :P ).
So anyway, now that the seed was planted, I knew she would think it till eternity, and as we started knowing each other better, I got him over (with a larger group of friends of course) home in various spans of time. This was primarily done so my mom doesn't forget.
Now being an Indian girl who is in the wrong side of 20s it's obvious that my mother would go berserk trying to find the right guy for me. That's where I acted smart, I let her do her thing, no high tension drama. She told her friends to find a suitable match, she became online savvy (if you know what I mean), scolded my dad for not having enough friends with boys of similar age.. the whole charades. And all this while I just sat in the back seat and enjoyed the show, for it's true that I wasn't sure about my choice either so I really didn't know if I should or should not present the Bong Boy in front of them just yet or not. So I just patiently waited for either my feelings to clear out or my parents to give me an ultimatum to settle down with some random guy they chose.
Neither happened!! Instead the most unexpected thing happened, last year on Dusshera/Durga Pooja my mom said lets go to CR park and visit a pandal. This is not surprising, we're an inquisitive bunch. We are happy experiencing new things, and given that the food in that area is super awesome that time of the year is an excuse good enough in itself. As I was pretty excited about the food, it didn't even occur to me that Mom had ulterior motives ( show me good food and I'd be so lost I wont even know if I'm sharing the table with an angry elephant!!), but still it occurred to me to confirm if the food.. so sorry.. the celebrations would still be on as it was almost afternoon. So I decided to call my Bong connection to confirm :D, he told me that last day is over in the afternoon. So I told my mom there was no point going, let's go watch Dusshera instead ( I'm a huge fan of Dusshera!! I never miss it :D). So we start out on our journey Mom and Me ^_^ and this is when she asks " Is he still interested in you?" I'm like huh! what! where do i hide! Damn! There is no escape, I cant jump off the metro!!" all this even before she completed her question. I mean come on Mom always knows, so conversations don't have to give out exact details, just references are enough. And that's when I realized that we were not going to eat in CR park had we gone there (minor heartbreak :P) Mom just wanted authentic setting, so filmy she is ;). After the moment of panic had passed I replied in a very nonchalant way " Don't know.. we'll ask him tomorrow" Mom says, "Ok! If his reply is yes, ask him to talk to his parents. Papa has agreed too!!!" And in my heart I could hear a million crackers and chanted a million thanks for giving me the best mom in the whole world :) She surely does rock :)
And that's how I got the approval, almost on a platter. How he approached the topic was quite the contrary, but that would be discussion matter of another blog post.
Till then..
See you around!
Now I'm not saying that there is any easy way to do it, but let's give our parents a little more credit shall we? Parents these days are way cooler than they were ever in the history of our country. So with that situation in mind, breaking the news should be a piece of cake. Right? Not quite?
Anyway, to each his own. I'm not sure if there is a guide book on how to approach this topic, so I'll just share my experience (which was relatively easy) and maybe people could borrow a leaf from it. It would have been tricky for me given that the "Boy" and I belong to different communities, yes it kind of still is a big deal but then it somehow only adds to my amusement now.
Oh yeah.. sorry I have a habit of digressing, I was sharing how I told my parents, lets start: We started dating about three years ago, it was then itself that I told my mom that there's this Bong guy in office and he likes me ( talk about forward thinking!! At that point of time I wasn't even sure if there ever would be a future and I happily told my mom) her reaction was as expected muted and non approving. She told me, I don't think you should encourage him, he's not the same as us ( Moms I tell you :P ).
So anyway, now that the seed was planted, I knew she would think it till eternity, and as we started knowing each other better, I got him over (with a larger group of friends of course) home in various spans of time. This was primarily done so my mom doesn't forget.
Now being an Indian girl who is in the wrong side of 20s it's obvious that my mother would go berserk trying to find the right guy for me. That's where I acted smart, I let her do her thing, no high tension drama. She told her friends to find a suitable match, she became online savvy (if you know what I mean), scolded my dad for not having enough friends with boys of similar age.. the whole charades. And all this while I just sat in the back seat and enjoyed the show, for it's true that I wasn't sure about my choice either so I really didn't know if I should or should not present the Bong Boy in front of them just yet or not. So I just patiently waited for either my feelings to clear out or my parents to give me an ultimatum to settle down with some random guy they chose.
Neither happened!! Instead the most unexpected thing happened, last year on Dusshera/Durga Pooja my mom said lets go to CR park and visit a pandal. This is not surprising, we're an inquisitive bunch. We are happy experiencing new things, and given that the food in that area is super awesome that time of the year is an excuse good enough in itself. As I was pretty excited about the food, it didn't even occur to me that Mom had ulterior motives ( show me good food and I'd be so lost I wont even know if I'm sharing the table with an angry elephant!!), but still it occurred to me to confirm if the food.. so sorry.. the celebrations would still be on as it was almost afternoon. So I decided to call my Bong connection to confirm :D, he told me that last day is over in the afternoon. So I told my mom there was no point going, let's go watch Dusshera instead ( I'm a huge fan of Dusshera!! I never miss it :D). So we start out on our journey Mom and Me ^_^ and this is when she asks " Is he still interested in you?" I'm like huh! what! where do i hide! Damn! There is no escape, I cant jump off the metro!!" all this even before she completed her question. I mean come on Mom always knows, so conversations don't have to give out exact details, just references are enough. And that's when I realized that we were not going to eat in CR park had we gone there (minor heartbreak :P) Mom just wanted authentic setting, so filmy she is ;). After the moment of panic had passed I replied in a very nonchalant way " Don't know.. we'll ask him tomorrow" Mom says, "Ok! If his reply is yes, ask him to talk to his parents. Papa has agreed too!!!" And in my heart I could hear a million crackers and chanted a million thanks for giving me the best mom in the whole world :) She surely does rock :)
And that's how I got the approval, almost on a platter. How he approached the topic was quite the contrary, but that would be discussion matter of another blog post.
Till then..
See you around!

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